I’m trying to break my habit of falling into the either/or trap. It’s really been holding me back lately. Admittedly, when I try to see things through a both/and lens, I can sometimes feel overwhelmed in business, life, and motherhood.
What do I mean? Take today’s spring snowfall, for example.
Ever the preparer, yesterday I had already rescheduled two morning meetings knowing that potential school closures could mean daycare closures for Z, and I didn’t want to cancel on folks last minute. They totally understood (because they are amazing humans).
But, because I feel like there are always a million to-dos left unchecked on my list, I was secretly hoping schools would stay open so that daycare would be open and I could actually get shtuff done, ya know?
As the night went on, I found myself checking the weather report and seeing that expected snow totals were increasing and it was likely that schools would be delayed or canceled. And, wouldn’t you know, instead of resting I was up a lot of the night checking the news.
When Z and I woke up, I checked my phone — somehow Madison schools were open despite most surrounding communities being closed. As we looked outside the window, pure joy lit up Z’s face. And then she started singing Jingle Bells and a flurry of other adorable things in her tiny voice: snowballs, Santa, boots, outside, etc. She looked at me expectantly— like, c’mon mom, what are we waiting for? Let’s go outside and play!
And then the guilt. Oh the guilt. Here my kid wants to go outside and play with me and I’m going to have to tell her we need to go to daycare, and we’re already behind schedule.
I took a moment to pause (while using the bathroom, of course), and wondered. What if we could do both? Sometimes when she gets home there is so much to do with supper prep and everything else that we don’t always have time to play. So, what if she’s a bit late to daycare? And I’m late working? And we prioritize play and connection first? Would the world end? Of course not.
So that’s what we did. With the thumbs up of her daycare provider of course.
Z and I played in the snow. Checked on our flowers. Shoveled. Laughed.
Now, back to work.
P.S. Is anyone else's kid afraid of the little red maple blossoms that have been falling to the ground? Z discovered them still clinging to a fallen branch last week and now she screams and refuses to get near them. I think when I said they were "buds" she heard "bugs," which she is not a fan of. Then, in an attempt to tell her they are "just flowers," she suddenly is skeptical about flowers. We visited my parents' farm over the weekend and she declared, "I don't like daffodils." And today when we shoveled and exposed the sidewalk, a few remaining maple buds were there and she wouldn't dare move past them. I ran into a neighbor the other day and she said her kiddo experienced something similar when he was young, too -- so, is it that they look like ladybugs or what's going on here? :)
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